Smoke Damage (smokedamage) wrote,
Smoke Damage
smokedamage

Smashed thumb today at cricket. Hurts like a motherfucker. Am very doubtful for the game on the weekend. Bent the nail back about halfway along the thumb, on the fourth ball I faced. Blood in the glove and stormed off to the petrol station – there’s my temper.

My temper is a source of drama for me, I can get very angry very quickly. I think that it’s one of the things that I like about myself. It’s good to have it, it’s a motivator, and so long as you can control it it’s ok.

“The Secret Life of Us” character, Kelly, learnt that in a relationship that it’s the differences, the push me-pull you of a relationship that really makes it work. “The grit in the oyster” is how Alex explains it to her. Without it, you can’t have a pearl.

Kiska and I are like that all the time. Both have horribly bad tempers.

I can’t work on Murray’s project. I don’t love it, and he does not trust me. And unless I have one of those things I don’t think I can be bothered. I trust implicitly and if I cannot get that back it’s not fair, and I probably shouldn’t be working the project. Hm. Questionable. Do I not want to do it because I have been refused? I don’t think so, it may involve some arrogance – I’ve been there, I’ve made films so listen to me.

I don’t think that I want to do it. And I think that is the most important thing. And that he does not trust me certainly does not make me any more keen at all.
Tags: bitching, filmmaking
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