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The Street

I rescued (perhaps) Little Josh from theBrothersBar and with the help of DJJimmy got him five nights a week at Ocean Fart

Saturday is Captain Kirk's last day at Confused and the owners are going to stick it out, despite the rumors and conjecture of the rest of the The Street Ensemble, and will be putting Pontiius in charge. This is an interesting move as Pontius has been on The Street forever and has quit or been fired from every bar there is and has something to prove. This also leaves us with two bartenders - Pontius and The Professional (who i will deal with in turn, because my "anything but Crown" response prompted him to pour me a viagra stiff shot of Bacardi 151, and there is nothing else to do wit 151 other than blow flame. Someone send/bring me a bottle of Bundy or Bundy OP and i will teach The Professional what is means to drink. Yes this may cost me my life, but such is a small price to pay.)

I sounded out the Manager over at The Big Cat, about bartending and told him my weaknesses - not familiar with the computer system, and not familiar with the wacky American shots, but he was curious enough to offer me a shot sometimes down the track. Skipper was not interested however and wants to keep me on the door.

Wednesday may see me (if the owners approve) bartending at Confused and if you fuckers do not come out to support me i will be annoyed - it will be $3 Wells and Domestic beers at least - and two bands of dubious quality - if it costs you $5 then i will give you a free drink. Monday nights may also end up being mine to bartend - Pontious is very keen on that. Again if you fail to turn up for at least ONE beer i will disown you.

Some pretty little blonde thing tried to take me home tonight, and was disappointed when she found me unresponsive to her advances. She had two years (it is almost that long) to come find me. Snooze, you lose.

First Brother took Little Joshs loss well as i expected, and there was no threats and stand over bullying because Cookie Monster is away (again).

I hate these cats because they will not stop trying to get food from the trash even though there is nothing in there they will eat. The slices of bread they were so keen on overnight, remain in their bowls untouched, and the pasta shells that were so sought after this morning that they scattered them all over the kitchen after a daring aerial raid on the nearly six-foot high cupboard sometime this morning while i slept, are again scattered over the kitchen floor, because they insist on shredding the garbage bags.

I am dreading importing these furry vandals to Australia. According to rosequeen they are much quieter than they used to be. Which is as refreshing as the Visigoths are nowhere near as dangerous as the Mongols" which i am sure was said in Rome days before The Fall.

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Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
whisperer12
Nov. 17th, 2006 08:41 pm (UTC)
Ocean Fart? WTF? Cats in Australia? Alien red flying gymnosperm? Smokey, are you ok? ;)
smokedamage
Nov. 17th, 2006 08:53 pm (UTC)
you need a slow readers version?
whisperer12
Nov. 17th, 2006 09:32 pm (UTC)
No. In fact, according to my GRE scores, I happen to be in the top 2% of verbal ability in this country. Plus, I know how to spell aluminum.....
cynical_rabbit
Nov. 17th, 2006 08:52 pm (UTC)
If he is calling for Bundy then he most assuredly is not OK
smokedamage
Nov. 17th, 2006 08:54 pm (UTC)
I WANT MY REVENGE ON THE PROFESSIONAL!!!!

BUNDY WILL DESTROY HIM
whisperer12
Nov. 17th, 2006 09:32 pm (UTC)
I agree... that stuff is swill!
rosequeen
Nov. 18th, 2006 02:46 am (UTC)
"Some pretty little blonde thing tried to take me home tonight, and was disappointed when she found me unresponsive to her advances. She had two years (it is almost that long) to come find me. Snooze, you lose.'

Damn straight you snooze you lose ladies. I know a great thing when I see it ;)


"According to rosequeen they are much quieter than they used to be. Which is as refreshing as the Visigoths are nowhere near as dangerous as the Mongols" which i am sure was said in Rome days before The Fall."


Trust me. They are.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )

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